I am back now, and I feel better.
No, this isn't because my circumstances are better. My daughter is still very anxious and I am still waiting for the doctor to get back to me about it.
But I have peace that passes all understanding, thanks to my Heavenly Father. I think I understand now that this is God's will for all of us in our family. But I think of what Paul said when he asked God to remove the thorn from his flesh, but God replied to him (I am paraphrasing) "No, but my Grace is sufficient for you"
No, this isn't because my circumstances are better. My daughter is still very anxious and I am still waiting for the doctor to get back to me about it.
But I have peace that passes all understanding, thanks to my Heavenly Father. I think I understand now that this is God's will for all of us in our family. But I think of what Paul said when he asked God to remove the thorn from his flesh, but God replied to him (I am paraphrasing) "No, but my Grace is sufficient for you"
The problem with me was, I didn't want to accept God's Will for me at this moment. I fought the reality that was. Yes Kaylee is improving, but we are still working on things and they could be better right now. Like I heard a pastor say on Sunday: "When you are flying on a plane, you can fret and fear all you want... but that plane is still going to land in that destination, whether you like it or not." (Well most times anyway...but thats not the point here)
I used to pray without ceasing "Lord please help Kaylee get better." Now, I still hope and pray for that, but I ask for strength and grace for me, Kaylee, and the rest of the family to be joyful and strong in living with the everyday struggles.
And I know He will supply those things, because He always has in the past. And it is so nice to be joyful again!
*Kaylee loves sleeping with her "baby" every night. As you can see, they have matching blankies :)
Thank you to those who prayed for me.
My brethren, count it all joy when ye fall into divers temptations;
Knowing this, that the trying of your faith worketh patience. James 1:2,3
That verse (2 Co.12:9) was responsible for me completely changing my outlook on autism too. I blogged about it here:
ReplyDeletehttp://bluehouseacademy.blogspot.com/2008/06/autism-adventure-part-iii.html
What an awesome God we have!
Kellie
Jen, I cling to James 1:2-3. I actually had it once on a little card in my car to remind me that we will suffer, but through it we'll learn much, get stronger and YES God will grant us the patience that we need :) I recently prayed for faith and the Lord's giving me faith and boldness that I've never had before. Keep your head up and know that If God is for us, nothing can be against us ~ autism, fear, anxiety, physical ailments, NOTHING! Praise God for the work He's done in Your life and the work He's doing in Kaylee's life!!! Your always in my prayers!
ReplyDeleteOh, and by the way, I love that picture of Kaylee! She's so precious!!!
ReplyDeleteI'm sorry Jen. I have zero advice but I am thinking of you
ReplyDeleteJen, you have the best attitude of any wife I know!! every day you suprise me with your renewed spirits that keep you going on this path we take to take care of Kaylee, Joey & Abs.
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